Here is a different kind of read that underlines the validity of the “virtual” debate and how social and whatever else networks influence our daily lives.

Again this year, my Rotary Club sponsored a speech contest among juniors and seniors from local high schools and I had the privilege of organizing the event. Essentially, the speeches had to answer the four basic rules we operate by: Is it the truth? Is it fair to all concerned? Will it build goodwill and better friendships? And lastly, is it beneficial to all concerned?

The young men wove the questions into speeches about politics and the current election process, while the young ladies concentrated on reality TV, and in this case, the virtual world and what it has in store.

Being exposed to people running into glass doors or telephone poles because their eyes are glued to little monitors on a daily basis, and flight attendants having to beg passengers to hit the off switch, I thought this speech written by Merryn McNeil, an 11th grader at Turner High School in Carrollton, Texas, might be a bit of an eye-opener to some. By the way, Merryn came in second place with her speech. Great to have youngsters like this among us. Makes our future look a little brighter.

Enjoy.

“OMG!! About to perform my Rotary Club speech in front of a bunch of awesomeeeeeeee people. Smiley face.* Oh, I’m sorry, I was just updating my Twitter status. But you understand, right?

“In today’s society, we have to constantly be connected with our friends in the virtual world, considering if we longer have any in the real world. When’s the last time you called a friend as opposed to sending them a text, or better yet, went and saw them! For many of you, chances are it’s been awhile. But the worst of it comes from my generation. We are all SO consumed in technology. Between Facebook, Twitter, texting, emails, face-to-face connections are a thing of the past.

“This has led to a barrier in communication that is becoming a primary source of conflict. But let’s step back and evaluate this problem using Rotarian Herbert J. Taylor’s four-way test. This test will use four main principles to determine whether the issue of communication is or is not ethical. By asking ourselves: Is it the truth, is it fair to all concerned, will it build goodwill and better friendships, and will it be beneficial to all concerned? By applying this four-way test, we can hopefully escape this black hole, which I call ineffective communication.

“Let’s start by asking, is it the truth? Well, according to Katherine Smith, writer for the Huffington Post, the average number of tweets per day has nearly tripled from 50 million to 140 million. So if we take away the 40 million Ashton Kutcher sent, you’re left with about 100 million tweets that do nothing to improve face-to-face communication. In addition, our conversations have become so superficial. I can bet most of us aren’t discussing the meaning of life through Tweets or text messages.

"The truth is, as social media increases, our chances of having an intellectual conversation decreases. Look at your own personal life. Can you honestly say technology hasn’t changed you? Has it made you lazier? Or less caring about those around you? Even our self-worth has been affected. We only upload the best pictures or check in when we’re at the nicest restaurants. We are so concerned with our virtual social lives that many of us have forgotten about the truth in our real lives.

“Which brings me to the second question: Is it fair to all concerned? NO. WAY. Last time I checked, Granny wasn’t on Facebook, and if she was, chances are she’s not updating very often. We are cheating ourselves out of what could be a fantastic life! If we could all just put away our phones once in a while, maybe we could get to know our friends and families again.

“Communication is essential in building relationships, but more importantly is that it’s effective communication. Without effective communication, problems are never addressed and can never be solved, and how is that fair to anyone? What’s happening is we are getting lost in translation, or rather, lost in technology. I want my kids to have the childhood I had growing up: awkward playground talks and bike races. If we keep going at this rate, cell phones will replace crayons, and playgrounds will have electric outlets for my 5-year-old’s Smart phone instead of a good ol’ swing set!

“But will it build goodwill and better friendships? I recently ran across an article Jake Reily, a college student at the Chicago Portfolio School, wrote about an experiment he did where he took a little time away from the virtual world. He called it “The Amish Project.” He disabled all social media, email and his cell phone for 90 days. The main thing he discovered was how unimportant some of these people were in his life. People he talked to almost every day on Facebook wanted nothing to do with him in the real world. He was wasting his time. He found out who his true friends were, as opposed to just those online. He said he “looked around the world, instead of reading about it on his phone.” He had so much time on his hands, the guy actually got pretty creative. Communication is key in building relationships, and if we aren’t communicating face to face, can you even call it communication at all?

 “And this brings us to our final question: Will it be beneficial to all concerned? Currently running on TV is a commercial about some new Droid Razr phone. Their whole advertising scheme is that the battery in their phone lasts the longest. The commercial ends with a woman saying, “If I could use my phone all day, I’d definitely feel more powerful!” Really? Your phone gives you power? I want to be powerful through speaking my mind, NOT tweeting it!

“I understand the benefits of technology, don’t get me wrong. But the fact that a phone makes you powerful is just sad. Technology is not going away, but we can’t let it dominate how we communicate with one another. We can’t afford to lose face-to-face communication. I’m not asking you to put away your phone when your boss is calling or when you have to check the stock market, but take the time to look at people again! Communicate with them face to face. Instead of sending LOL, how about you actually laugh out loud? So rather than finishing my tweet about this luncheon, I’m going to tell someone about it. *Smiley face.*”

Hope you enjoyed reading and nodded a few times. Your comments are always welcome and this time, your comments and reader letters for Merryn would be appreciated.

Hans Mecker is president of International Convention and Marketing Services (ICCS) and the Global Exhibit Alliance. He can be reached in Arlington, Texas, at This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it or www.gea.247.com or 817-563-1334.